* Yes, Wednesday. Because I was always late for Golden Retriever Tuesdays, I thought I'd give myself an extra 24 hours.
I love Halloween. It gives me endless joy to watch the conservative Christian types take part in a pagan ritual. Believe me, I'll be dressing up and taking part in any and all Halloween-related festivities that come my way. Except one.
By now you know how much I adore Arnold the dog. You're aware that my connection to him rivals that of the crazy cat lady to her herd of husband-substitutes. That said, THIS is not ok:
People, this is not a happy dog! Despite my completely unhinged friendship with my pet, I would never dream of outfitting him in something like this:
because let me tell you, even though Arnie didn't bite me when I was ripping porcupine quills out of his snoot, and even though he didn't even curl his lip at me after he was hit by a car and I had to lift his sore little body up into my truck, I think he'd snap if I ever tried to wiggle him into this:
I mean, how itchy!
Whoever these people are, they're a bunch of sick monkeys. Don't dress your dog for Halloween, people. There's no reason to, as they're already ideally suited for the task of tick-or-treating as is:
Ahem, I will not be taking Arnold from house to house, mostly because our neighbors frighten me, but also because COME ON!!! Haven't you been paying attention? This is sick!
Instead, Arnie and I will hopefully be doing this on the 31st: